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I
can't remember exactly when or why I started going but Tranquillity
has become a regular part of my Monday morning for the past couple
of years. Okay, so I've missed a few because of having to work,
but if ever I am free and in Stratford between 10 and 11am this
is most likely where you'll find me. If you're ever around at that
time you should come too.
Tranquillity used to be called Stretch and Relax and when I'm describing
it to my friends I call it Yoga for Plebs. It's a class held at
Atherton Leisure Centre, just up the road from me, in which we do
a lot of yoga breathing, a load of poses, and then a bit of relaxation.
Tranquillity couldn't be further away from Madonna-style yoga, or
the yoga practised by supple young things in beautifully minimalist
studios in the more upmarket neighbourhoods of our city. For a start
it is cheap. I pay the full price of £2.90 for a one-hour session
and it's the best money I spend all week. Secondly, the punters
are decidedly unglamorous or hip.
Let me say a bit more about my classmates. The same faces turn up
every week, plus a few new people. Of about thirty participants
half are wiry pensioners, there are a handful of gym bunnies, plus
miscellaneous oddballs, students and misfits. Most are black and
Asian and all are women, give or take the rare man who ventures
in to the class once every few months or so. We are "the ladies"
and "the girls" as in "Alright Ladies, time to get on your feet,"
or "Come on girls and B R E A T H E!" or "Now ladies, I want you
to clench and relax your toilet muscles."
Denny is the star of the show, she's our instructor. Now she is
in the Madonna league. I can't believe her body, it's muscle and
sinew and bone. She is super-strong and can do unbelievable things.
It makes me feel humbled that a goddess like her should want to
spend quality time with a bunch of creaky old farts like us.
It's hard for me to feel kindly about skinny athletic women, since
their bodies are the standard by which fat folk like me are measured
in the cultural eye. Women like Denny are the ideal, and I am at
the other end of the spectrum, the very absolutely definitely not
ideal. But you can't deny that she is marvellous, her suppleness
is incredible. I am glad I can see the goodness in her body, it
makes me feel one step closer to my personal utopia where all body
difference is respected.
Anyway, we are all in love with Denny. She sees us at our most enfeebled
and still makes us feel as though we can really do this thing and
that, yes, we are actually getting better at it. We thrive on her
exuberance and enthusiasm. She makes us feel blessed and special
just for having a go at downward-facing dog, or warrior three, or
lion, or frog, or pigeon pose. She is totally dedicated to us, a
real professional, she pushes us and she's gentle. We are so lucky
to have her and we know it.
We suck up thrilling bits of personal information about her: her
chronic lateness; the fact that she didn't drink enough water when
she was younger; the 17 years she spent as a secretary in the city;
the weekend she spent with ultra-tough fitness enthusiasts (me:
"freaks") whose wrists, she said, are probably weaker than ours
because they couldn't do the dog. Best of all was when we found
out that it was her 40th birthday, no one could believe that she
wasn't in her twenties. We all chipped in and got her a present
and a card.
I'm as intrigued as anybody and I wonder what Denny's like in real
life. I imagine her stuck in a traffic jam, trying not to succumb
to negative energy. I think of her practising her yoga moves in
her front room at home, or buying more mail-order new age yoga muzak
tapes, or shopping for exercise outfits, or hanging out with her
friends (which is where my imagination stops - I can't envision
who her pals might be).
Denny's a bit of a yoga hippy. She tells us to focus our third eye
when we are trying to balance on one leg. She talks about auras
and energy. Sometimes we do a move that requires us to "thank the
earth" and "salute your god, whoever that may be." I salute rock
and roll. This hippy talk would severely get on my tits out in the
real world but at Tranquillity it makes me smile, it makes me happy.
For a while we were a class in search of a venue. As the number
of Tranquillity fans grew we were moved around the leisure centre
from studios that were so tiny we had to sit in a certain formation
to avoid knocking over our neighbour, to the indoor bowls hall,
where there was open hostility between us and the noisy bowlers,
who had "negative vibes," according to our leader.
As hippies do, she went travelling last year for a few months. We
had a replacement teacher who was so tough and relentless that it
decimated the class. I think there were cheers when Denny returned.
I love Tranquillity. I'm always scared before I go that I won't
be able to do it, that it'll be too hard for me this week. I don't
say much in the class. I try and do my best. I always have a go
and I'm always loose and warm and relaxed and filled with happiness
afterwards. I love being with a group of friendly women who I might
not otherwise get the opportunity to meet. I'm the quiet one, it's
like I'm taking a holiday from being me. But the best reason to
go is that there's always a chance something truly extraordinary
will happen whilst I'm there, something so lovely that it'll carry
me through a week of drudge, or depression, or grief or sadness.
I remember one time Denny got carried away with affirmations and
managed to get every single person to say alone to the class: "I
am loved." It was a beautiful and moving experience. On another
occasion we worked in pairs, helping each other to balance whilst
we attempted princess pose. I was with a woman who must have been
in her sixties, she was small and a bit podgy, all snowy hair and
bony feet. I held her hands as she stood on one leg, bent forward,
and unfolded her body in a breathtakingly elegant arc, I would never
have guessed that this woman had such grace within her.
But the most remarkable Tranquillity moment came last winter. It
was a bitter day, a week into the American invasion of Iraq, and
everybody felt numbed and distressed by the war. We sat in a circle
in the Atherton bowling hall and went through our moves. When it
came to the end, to the relaxation part of the session, we simply
chanted. We chanted for the people of Iraq, we hummed and breathed
and sent all our love and vibrations to the people who were getting
battered. It was corny, that's true, and it would never have changed
the course of events, but it was done with love by a group of humble,
ordinary people who don't feature on our government's radar; we
sent out warmth to our sisters and brothers when every other form
of protest and show of war-disgust had failed. It was the only thing
left for us to do. |
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